Purgatory Penman

An Epistle of the Penitential

Name:

Like most people, my main desire is to be understood. Hopefully, this blog will enable me to completely explain who I really am as a person. I desire your communication. Write to me at: P.O. Box 40543, Memphis, TN 38174-0543

Saturday, August 26, 2006

NIGHT CLASSES

Last night I had a wonderful dream

Dreams are peculiar things. They come when you are asleep, unconscious, and vulnerable. You have no control over their content. While dreaming, anything can happen.

Last night, I dreamt I was a student in the audience of a college course, one that encouraged student participation in the discussion, an environment I especially enjoy. The other students were young married couples. The instructor's interesting lecture concerned a catagory of sins I have wrestled with since I was eleven years old.

Once you open the door of your life a crack to this particular kind of evil thought process, this iniquity bullies his way in and brings all his friends. These parasites begin by diverting your attention from things that are truly important, proceed to eliminate all the aspects of your life that you hold dear, the people and interests that give your life meaning, and don't stop until their host is completely alienated and destroyed.

I unwittingly opened the door to them after my father's death, when as a child I found a paperback novel of pornographic literature an older person thought he had hidden. The initial, protective disgust and revulsion I felt in my own strength still remains, but has been periodically overwhelmed and subdued by stronger forces during times of stress. Alone against their power, I was helpless.

This sobering nocturnal collegiate assembly was revealed to be a sophisticated Sunday School class. I suddenly realised with astonishment that my teacher was Jesus Himself! He told me compassionately that when your life and heart are completely filled with Him and His Holy Spirit, all the characteristics of His personality: His love, compassion, mercy, and kindness--become your own. There is no room for anything else. The evil spirits flee as if from a burning building! He made it all so simple to understand; I wanted to remain there in His presence forever. The instructive session ended with everyone singing an old Christian hymn I knew from growing up in the Church of Christ, "Trust and Obey." I cannot describe what I was feeling then in words.

I awoke with the hyumn still going through my head and tears pouring from my eyes. I could not go back to sleep nor rest until I had written all this down.

J. Wallace